| Loner Loraxson | |||
|---|---|---|---|
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| General information | |||
| Universe | The Loraxsons | ||
| Aliases | Lomer J. Loraxson Lomersapien Kwyjibo neanderloracius (Erroneous) | ||
| Classification | Kwyjibo loraxianus¨ | ||
| Species type | Hominid | ||
| Homeworld | Earth | ||
| Environment | North America, Loraxia | ||
| Intelligence | Sapient (Low intelligence, high awareness of discrimination) | ||
| Biochemistry | Carbon-based lifeform | ||
| Discovered | January 14, 1990 | ||
| Discoverer | Bartholomew Jojo Simpson (he traveled to the future) | ||
| Biological information | |||
| Lifespan | Average human lifespan | ||
| Reproduction | Sexual; gives live birth | ||
| Average height | Human height | ||
| Average weight | Heavyset | ||
| Locomotion | Bipedal | ||
| Feeding behavior | Omnivorous | ||
| Prey | Evil Loraxes (especially santa-bearded ones) Bananas Donuts Any fast food item Beer | ||
| Predators | Kwyjibo Followers of The_Lorax | ||
| Distinctive features | Fat, balding, particularly stupid, lack of a chin, ginger | ||
| Eye color | Black (sometimes) | ||
| Skin color | Golden yellow | ||
| Lineage information | |||
| Ancestor(s) | *Kwyjibo
| ||
| Cultural information | |||
| Alignment | Neutral | ||
| Personality | Short temper | ||
| Organization | Families | ||
| Language(s) | American English Lorax gibberish | ||
| Affiliation(s) | The Loraxian States of America | ||
| Capital city | Springlorax, LSA | ||
| Leaders | Evil Dictator Lorax (formerly) | ||
| Sociocultral characteristics | |||
| Members | Loner J. Loraxson Bart Loraxsons Large Loraxsons Lor-isa Loraxsons Laggy Loraxsons | ||
| Scientific taxonomy | |||
| Planet | Earth | ||
| Domain | Eukaryota | ||
| Kingdom | Animalia | ||
| Subkingdom | Eumetazoa | ||
| Infrakingdom | Bilateria | ||
| Superphylum | Deuterostomia | ||
| Phylum | Chordata | ||
| Subphylum | Vertebrata | ||
| Infraphylum | Gnathostomata | ||
| Superclass | Tetrapoda | ||
| Class | Mammalia | ||
| Subclass | Theriiformes | ||
| Infraclass | Holotheria | ||
| Superorder | Archonta | ||
| Order | Primates | ||
| Suborder | Haplorrhini | ||
| Infraorder | Simiiformes | ||
| Superfamily | Hominoidea | ||
| Family | Hominidae | ||
| Tribe | Hominini | ||
| Subtribe | Kwyjibina | ||
| Genus | Kwyjibo (Somarinoa, 2014) | ||
| Species | K. loraxianus | ||
| Other information | |||
| Status | Least Concern | ||
| Creator | Matt Groening and the Evil Lorax | ||
| First sighting | December 17, 1989 | ||
| Last sighting | Current | ||
| Possible population | 1 | ||
The Loraxian Kwyjibo (Kwyjibo loraxianus) is a species of kwyjibo (four-fingered long-headed hominids) made up by Bartholomew Jojo Simpson and the Lorax while playing Scrabble with his family to try and cheat his way out of the game. The Lorax was angry he lost so he forced all the Homer Simpsons who laughed at him to be slaves in Loraxia (The land where the Lorax is the ruthless dictator, and is a well known kwyjibophobe), when the Lorax would get bored he would give his children to the Kwyjibo, resulting in a hybrid Kwyjibo-Lorax (Kwjiborax), as the generations went on the Lorax bloodline would become less dominant in the genes of the Kwyjiboraxes and as a result many kwyjiboraxes would become more kwyjibo-like with every generation until they looked very similar to their pure-blooded Kwyjibo cousins. Now the Loraxian Kwyjibos (An average member of this species is 90-95% Kwyjibo and 5-10% Lorax) are treated like second-class in Homerland because most of them are gingers (because of Lorax genes)
They are big, dumb, balding North American apes with a small chin and a short temper.
Behavior[]
They are aggressive in nature, and their most preferred method of attack is strangulation and Also Agressive To Yellow Humans (Homo Sapiens Simponesis).
Gallery[]
Trivia/Notes[]
- Trivia: This creature was once mistaken for a Neanderthal.
- Note: Do not blank, move or remove the image on this page