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Furon
Cryptosporidium-137
General information
Universe Destroy All Humans!
Classification Roswellius furon
Species type Grey
Homeworld Furon, Proxima Centauri, Milky Way
Intelligence Sapient
Biochemistry Carbon-based lifeform
Biological information
Reproduction Sexual, gives live birth (until they lost their genitals)
Cloning (until regaining their genitals)
Locomotion Bipedal
Feeding behavior Carnivorous (former?; presumed)
Eye color Dark Red
Skin color Gray
Lineage information
Descendant(s) PSI Mutant
Related species Roswellian (possibly)
Vree (possibly)
Zeta Reticulan (likely)
Farmer Alien
Cultural information
Alignment Chaotic Neutral
Personality Narcissistic sociopaths
Imperialist
Organization Furon Empire
Affiliation(s) Furon Empire
Leaders Emperor Meningitis, Emperor Master, Emperor Cryptosporidium
Orthopox
Sociocultral characteristics
Members Admiral Cyclosporiasis, Blastomycosis, "Crypto's Mother", Cryptosporidium-136, Cryptosporidium-137, Cryptosporidium-138, Endometriosis, Gastroenteritis-999, Helicobacter, Holopox, Orthopox-13, Orthopox-14, Princess Ecoli, The Librarian, The Master, Toxoplasma Gondii
Scientific taxonomy
Planet Furon
Domain Eukaryota (Complex lifeforms)
Kingdom Animalia (Animals)
Phylum Chordata
Subphylum Vertebrata
Superclass Tetrapoda (Four-limbed animals)
Class Pseudomammalia (False mammal)
Order Mollovuma
Family Cinerihomidae
Genus Roswellius (Greys) (Agent 41, 2017)
Species R. furon (Agent 41, 2017)
Other information
First sighting In-Universe: 1950
Real life: 2002
Last sighting 2020

The Furons are a species of diminutive Grey extraterrestrials indigenous to the planet Furon.

Physiology[]

It's a testament to Furon ingenuity that Furons, with their statistically large brain to body mass proportions, can walk at all.

Like some other extraterrestrial species such as Endermen, Furons cannot immerse themselves in water. Too much contact and it burns through the skin like acid. If they don't get out quickly, they'll perish!

Furons, due to many years of replication, have lost the ability to reproduce naturally. A current, unfortunate lack of genitalia is a key factor. Current replication methods use cloning, but even this method is showing signs of strain. It is essential to find the traces of pure human DNA hidden within the human genome to fully restore future Furons.

Psionic Capabilities[]

The Furons are psychic entities and are capable of many techniques, the least of which is perhaps known as the Cortex Scan. Extracting the thoughts of lifeforms on conquered planets is an unpleasant necessity. Furons do, however, find these absurd thoughts useful when making small talk at social gatherings. Despite traces of Furon DNA hidden within their own genome, humans' thoughts are even more vapid than Martians' internal musings. Furons hypothesize this insipidness is due to humans' tiny brain mass compared to Furons' on sizeable cerebrums.

As highly efficient invaders, Furons prefer simply bending their new subjects' will to their own. The long and arduous process of earning conquests' trust can be so...tedious. To do this, they will implant a situation-specific command in a human's brain to make them comply.

Another basic - but essential - mind-control command is the Hypno Blast Distract. This technique was developed to get invaders out of sticky situations while simultaneously doing some self-care to de-stress during the hard work of a relentless invasion. This will force a compliant target to temporarily distract others.

Another psychic ability of the Furon race is psychokinesis. A Furon invader can levitate objects and enemies. Using superior Furon brain power, Furons can throw these objects, using them as lethal flying projectiles.

One of their most frightening mental abilities is the Brain Extraction. Officially, Furons harvest a species' DNA and save it for government-regulated use to improve the Furon species. Unofficially, there is a flourishing black market trade in illegally-sourced DNA. These removed brains can be used by Furons to charge their shields on the fly.

Technology[]

Personnel Equipment[]

Experimental Psi-Link Holobob[]

To facilitate planet conquest, Furons have developed the ability to fuse their minds with that of their eventual conquests'. Initial psi-links in R&D were too strong, however, and led to unforeseen long-term neurological effects. Current psi-link technology, which binds the creature's brain and the invader's, is temporary and must be reinforced with additional scanning.

Disengage Holobob[]

Assuming an uncomfortable holobobbed form is fortunately temporary, due to the amount of concentration required to maintain the illusion. All known bugs in the system have been removed. It is entirely risk-free! A Furon can drop active Holobob disguises to return to their true form, as needed.

Disrupted Holobob[]

The Holobob disguise can be disrupted or disengaged due to the cumulative energy exerted by the invader during sustained attacks. However, state-of-the-art shock absorption built into the brain-body Holobob link system protects the invader from unpleasant side effects, improving on initial prototype models. As this is the case, an invader must always remember that taking any offensive actions will temporarily disrupt Holobob disguises.

If humans do catch a glimpse of the Furon form in its natural state, their brains cannot unsee it, compromising the Holobob disguise. Besides destroying these "alert" humans outright, hiding briefly should allow them to recover their perviously ignorant state. Studies show that they don't remember anything they can't see for very long--hence the amount of advertising on their planet.

A good way for an invader to avoid this is to use their Hypno Blast Forget ability; during an invasion, it's often best to erase all memory of unfortunate cross-cultural misunderstandings.

Holobob Concentration Matrix[]

Though vaguely unpleasant, Furon invaders must learn to overcome their visceral revulsion to taking on a form far less aesthetically pleasing than their own. It's for the greater good. Using this device allows a Furon to stay disguised for longer by scanning the cortex of other targets.

Jetpack Thrusters[]

A staple of every Furon clone's kit, lighter-than-air eukaryotic fuel cells use modified Furon-based endoplasmic reticulum to power the jetpack. However, the rechargeable fuel cells only last so long before they automatically shit down to prevent certain death from overheating.

Personal Energy Shield Matrix[]

Not even Furons are invulnerable. Their shields need replenishing; otherwise, they lose protection against wounds, which they could withstand, and against germs on foreign planets.

Psionic Interface[]

Alert Levels[]

The alert system, scaling from one to four, is designed to assist Furon invaders in real time. Once the alert sounds, this system gives ample time to avoid attracting attention from the barely cognizant lifeforms on the target planet. Invaders ignore these alerts at their own risk.

Lock Target[]

Psionically-enhanced vision augmentation, used by Furons to obtain telemetric data from the mothership, can be switched to Focus Mode. With its link to both the invader's weapons and the cerebral cortex, Focus Mode enables Furon invaders to aim more efficiently.

Psi-Power Cerebral Counteract[]

The PPCC ability enables Furons to reset psi-abilities with agility and precision. All psi-abilities are reset when this ability is used, improving efficiency metrics in the field. This allows them to interrupt any psi ability while mentally linked. This also resets Psychokinesis and the Abduct-O-Beam.

Target Switch[]

Via mental psi-commands sent directly from the Furon invader's brain to a transceiver in orbit, the invader can control the focus mode connection at will. With a thought, an invader can quickly lock on to different targets to eliminate the most serious threats quickly and efficiently.

Personnel Weaponry[]

Zap-O-Matic[]

This legacy weapon has seen action since the days of the Furon-Martian wars and is still in service today. Powered by the Zap-O-Cell battery, it recharges whenever it's not being fired.

Saucer Equipment[]

Energy Train Matrix System[]

Using highly advanced energy transfer systems, the Abduct-O-Beam is able to completely drain an object of its energy, repurposing it to replenish the saucer's shields.

Furon Harvester Probes[]

These automated drones were launched from the Mothership pre-arrival to Earth. Due to a hard-coded factory default, the latest DNA harvesting probes must be manually returned to the ship. Collecting them allows an invader to retrieve the DNA they gathered.

Graviton Shield Generator[]

Each ship in the Furon fleet comes equipped with a standard issue Graviton Shield Generator. Composed of hexagonal tiles, this system is designed to generate a graviton barrier around the ship. If exposed to any form of energy, the barrier will absorb the incoming effect by depleting the energy provided by the capacitors of the Graviton Barrier Generator. While larger Furon ships can replenish these capacitors independently, smaller ships like the Furon Scout Ship require external recharge via the Energy Train Matrix System.

Saucer Weaponry[]

Abduct-O-Beam[]

The junior version o the ar more powerful Abduct-O-Beam on the mothership. One of the Furons' signature weapons, it's designed to terrify the local populace, suspending any creature or object in mid-air, then releasing it!

Death Ray[]

A favored Furon weapon for both mass destruction and planet-conquest, it is a standard feature on the Furon Scout Ship. Certain death is always a useful negotiation tactic. Firing at individuals, vehicles, and buildings for extended periods will cause the Death Ray to overheat, but it quickly cools down when not in use.

Saucer Transmogrify[]

In ancient times, when 300 Furons were surrounded by enemy Martian fighters, campylobacter units were transferred into a saucer, hot-wiring the system in a desperate - but ingenious! - ploy. The result? The ability to psionically transmogrify ordinary junk into ammunition! Extracting energy from inanimate objects crushes the objects and allows for grinding it into ammunition for both the Sonic Boom and Quantum Deconstructor weapons.

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